Johny & the Cribs (to all the males in the world)

I woke up a bit late this morning.. Blame the 'techy wannabe chick' last nite for doing some network configuration on my pc.. hell that was me! The later i wake up, the later i'll be reaching bangsar and the longer i have to wait for the train. Skipped few trains and that gives me time to drift my mind away.. well, i couldn't be left alone and definitely will start thinking or exercising my mind about anything.

In front of me were 2 guys, the one with a nicely ironed attire where its hard for you to find a single wrinkle on the pants nor shirt.. He looks so comfortable in that attire. the other one was a XXXL bloke with a baggy shirt and quite a tight pants where you can easily see the unwanted flesh plus the triple XL undergarment that obviously traced out from his tight arse pants. As I was standing behind them, it gave me a wide view of observation. Its not that i enjoyed looking at those 2 opposite gender's arses.. Maybe a good way to get my brain a warm up. (I have to make myself xtra CLEAR here.. no sexual intentions or whatsoever..) just curious about ONE particular thing.. the 'well-dressed' bloke was probably wearing a boxer brief (a tight version of boxer) or a seamless garment (y i say that? coz i can't hardly see the lines) and the triple XL guy was probably wearing a lose grandfather type of brief coz the line was obviously seen and its not a pleasant view.. trust me peeps! I'm not being discriminative over sizes and obese . But those category could still look good with an apropriate attire and a lil bit of groomings. I wish i could just approach the triple XL guy and 'brief' him for a good cause.. but of course i don't want a pervert perception freely thrown out towards me. But its sick to see that!(remember the scene in austin powers where mike meyers was so disturbed to see the mole guy..that was the situation!)

OK, below are the tips for you guys out there.. you can skip this segment if you think you are well aware about it and you are quite satisfied with how it looks.. but you may proceed if you wanna have some tips on it or you can just have fun reading it ok? No offence to any party or whatsoever..

I did some research on it.. (another disclaimer:this does not based on my sexual preferences) Ironically, Mr. Klein may not want you to know this, but going without his or anyone else's when out and about is healthy (barring some of the "side effects" - liberating, get caught in your zipper, and or proudly pitching tents at the publics). It's your choice to wear or not to wear; and not everyone wants, or has, to know about it. The question is, if you do.. what type of undergarments are to choose with, what and when.

Have you ever heard the debate about whether men should wear boxers or briefs? It goes something like this: Briefs are tighter, so it's possible that they can raise your body temperature above the norm for sperm to survive. So if a guy wants to be really fertile, boxers are the way to go. Truth is, this has yet to be scientifically proven(lose brief is a NO-NO dude!)

For those who enjoys wearing a thong, you are expressing yourself, but it might be hurting you not anyone else, it depends.. if sexy makes you feel good, enjoy! how can a thong be wrong?

For those who's basically active and a gym person, a Calvin Klein Gripper Jam would be the best choice. Its made in 100percent cotton and good styling under workout shorts. No worries of pitching tents during workout.. ahaks... good grip yet comfy!

So, what are you waiting for.. throw all your rotten lose old brief and pick ur flavor.. feel good and think good about yourself. Remember your future starts 'there'.

Hope this helps, and hang in there!

A lil gal & me

Have u ever bumped into someone that reminds u of your childhood? The way she walks, the way she smiles, the way she talks, the way she sulks, the way she does every single moves make you put yourself into the miniature you? Well, i was patiently waiting for my sister at my usual waiting place whenever i wanna hitch a ride with her; KL Sentral Departure Exit (yeah, the same place i saw the hot gay..) Trying to clear my cache out from the stress day. Garbage in garbage out..i was really in a need of having a cup of joe or a chow down with my chickaz.. talk out..laugh out..nothing more but schmoozing like old times, but most of my galfriends are bz with their partners and life now. My empty mind suddenly flashed back into a very classic background..(if i can picturize it..it shall be in sepia mode) when i saw one chubby gal with a pointed chin.. with her curly locks..sitting down alone.. her mom was actively talking to a middle aged lady.. i can barely hear what they were talking.. some tupperware party gossips i guess! "Tupperware murah..bla..bla..bla.. new year..*&ž!@. bla.. rumah kak Dayah..bla..bla.." hehheh...not only youngsters obsess about new year party whereas the makcik are also bz planning for their tupperware party! it made me smile for a sec..what a generation gap.. there i go again..drifting..ok i'm back to my story now..Anyway, the conversation didn't catch my attention much.. but the lil 'me'.. hey thats me! i swear to god she looks so much like me when i was 4-5! There was something in her eyes.. it was something in her looks that made me think that she's lack of something.. she was sitting there looking at her mom and trying to gain her attention but to no avail.. hey lil kid... whats wrong with you? u need company? poor u empty soul.. i was talking to myself..trying to connect some sort of telepathic conversation with the lil gal.. suddenly my own conversation started to echo back to my soul.. does the lil gal need a company or me myself the one who needs one? The gal i was observing was actually a reflection of me.. my contemplative moment suddenly disturbed by a honk. geez my sis arrived.. hence the question keeps haunting me the whole journey.. do i really need a company?can't human live alone.. talk alone? or am i just being too pathetic? or should i toss the feeling away? lil gal.. thou shall not be like me..

I was poked & electrified!!

I never thought that the pain I was having on my right knee could lead to a torn ligament. At first I thought it was just a normal strain. Applied some deep heat and put on my knee pad. But it gets worsen after each day. Decided to visit a doctor. We searched around Taipan for a clinic which still opens but we failed. It was already 9pm. Suddenly one left turn has brought us to this one reflexology and physiotherapy centre.. The tag at the door showed it opens till 11pm! With a hope that it is the right one for my knee problem and a slight hesitation, we skeptically entered. There came a Chinese girl entertained us. But we couldn’t understand a shit! I was trying to make some sign language while showing my knee with hobble moves and I guess she understood that we requested for a doctor for checkup. She called out someone from inside in a language that we couldn’t understand again.. And it disappoints me a bit to come to know that there is only ONE person in the centre who could speak malay and English. All of ‘em are originally from Beijing and been here for less than 3 months. It kinda freaked me out to have to be treated from someone that I don’t even understand a word! But heck..the pain was unbareable..

He twisted my knee with different rotation..i didn’t feel any pain.. but when he pressed at one point, I screamed out loud.. everyone turned their head..damn.. Then he talked to that Chinese gal (the translator).. quite a long one.. I was looking at lisa and she looked back at me in puzzle. Then, the Chinese gal translated me with one short word.. “Torn ligament”.. I whispered at lisa’s ears.. “woaa… what a short translation for a long sentence!”

Then the doc took out 2 thick needles out from a pack of sterilized medic cutleries… I stared at lisa and gave her a strange look. She asked me to be calm. The doc asked me to stretch my legs and relax.. Then I felt something poked into my knee.. and I was actually electrocuted!! That was me..being acupunctured!

Back off!! I'm volcanic today..

I woke up this morning with a hope that i could carry on my day with a glowing smile.. but suddenly dark clouds came right above my head and strike me a very fierce thunder! My day turns out to be very gloomy. I know shits happen regardless who you are and what mood you choose to have on that particular day.. But please.... today is monday.. not again.. not another monday blues for me!

I had an argument with someone this morning.. Definitely an argument that i never want to start or even drag.. coz i bet it won't bring anywhere or clear any dark clouds away. Arguing with someone who has an extremely high rate of egos is a no-no situation that you might want to intervene.. If you keep your mouth shut, they might think that you are guilty and don't have anything against it; whereelse if you stand on your words, they might think that you are trying to cover up your shits!!

The volcano was about to errupt its magma. Those words were becoming so sarcastic and incisive. It somehow caused me become more pressurized and forced upwards to the surface.. voila' the volcano finally burst!

Well, we have the rights to tell or not to tell. Its not that you are trying to lie or cheat on someone.. its just a matter of keeping things to yourself. If you think you prefer to keep things to yourself..whats wrong with that. I mind my own beeswax..and you take care your own goddamn shits.. can't you deal with it?

It was not a cinch to handle such an impossible rate of egos. It seems to be over the equilibrium point. I decided to cut it out and jumped off the car to calm myself down. Another word from me will definitely drop me into tears.. This watery eyes can't barely hold the drops anymore. Wished that i won't bump into someone i know. But things always come when you don't need 'em. Damn..out of all the days.. i met my someone that i never met for sometime.. not one but TWO! Immediately wiped away those tears and act like nothing happened. I was good in that.. hope they don't notice anything..unless.. yeah.. unless they read this blog.. damn!

Strictly for straight guys!

I was reading one article on the internet and suddenly flashed my memory back of one incident happened a few months ago. This jaw-dropping incident disturbed my emotion for the whole day and perceptions towards fine looking man up till now. It took place in front of the Departure Exit in KL Sentral.. I was heading to my office with my normal routine pace~rushing, suddenly a tanned hunk beefcake probably in his early 30s caught my eye with his ABSOLUTE HUNK charisma. He managed to slow my pace down.. i was stunned by his whole PACKAGE.. Gosh that white semi transparent linen shirt falls comfortably on his lean abs.. he looks so clean and well groomed. Perfect enuff to be a stardom. He was on his cell phone talking to someone. His mid-low toned voice makes my heart pumped even faster than the normal rate.. my adrenaline rushed in harshly into my veins.. but didn't want it to look too obvious.. did a bang up job in controlling my facial expression. Noticed with my eye tail he was glancing at me .. damn....my knee started feeling so week till i can't properly walk.. hold on gal..be strong and take a deep breath.. with full of charisma, i did a slight glance on him and yes! he was actually staring.. damn..The moment i passed by him, suddenly someone came over him and they started hugging each other followed by a 5 secs passionate kiss.. What an anti-climaxx! this is a far-fetched moment in my 26 year old lifehood to see such an incident actually happened live right infront of my face... yeah..maybe i was a bit naive or even too wet behind the ears, but hellowwww.. i haven't finished my story yet.. the one that he actually kissed was a dowdy-frowsty-bald-beer belly middle aged mat salleh chap! Grrrrrrrooossss!! what a low blow to see such a fine looking young bloke doing such despicable behaviour.. What a total waste to lose one of the God's beautiful creations. I wonder how many of this type of abstracted homo sapiens exist in this world!

erm..excuse me Mr Commuter! Mind ur language..

It was one hell of a sleepy morning. Yeah..it was Monday blues indeed. I was antsy for the train and set my goals for today.. no more grace and respectful entering. I am gonna wildly enter and get a seat! I don’t care!! My goal of continuing my sleep in the train turned out to be a success. Normally its hard to get a seat at that peak hour, but sleepy sapien gotta do what a sleepy sapien gotta do! luck was on my side.. With my sleepy eyes, rest my bum on the seat and in less than a minute I was already dozed off into the world of unconsciousness like no one else’ business. Couldn’t care less whether I roar or snore.. Suddenly my pieceful, recharging moment was disturbed by an interfered voice of the Commuter driver broadcasted out from the speaker saying a foul language.. “Pantat Dalam, Pantat Dalam…. ” damn… I was awake the whole journey…