30 minutes contemplation.

sarong photo girl., originally uploaded by marshma11ow.

I have 1 hour before we go to Midvalley and buy a wedding gift for a colleague's wedding tomorrow. SO, let me kill my time to blog. Damn.. where do i start now. So much things to blog so lil time. Had nasi lemak so called rendang ayam this morning and i am still full. What can we get later for RM170 (money pool collected from my department). Someone suggested a baby stroller. LOL. Well, since this friend of ours already made a clear statement on getting preggy on her first night.. Baby stroller would be a cool thing to consider.

I am being a cool biatch and extra rebellious today . Wearing jeans.. or denim is a NO-NO here even if its during dress-down day like today. I just don't give a farting shit anymore. Sack me if they need to. I went down to the pantry with my "don't give a shit" look. Had my nasi lemak and did notice the one kind look as if you are wearing a red undies on top of your blue tight pants. (only superman is officially allowed to do that). As my strong and rebellious instinct forced me this morning, I DON'T CARE. After my happy moment with nasi lemak, we walked out the pantry and guess who i bumped into? Tan Sri ***! erk. fart. Within my 4 glorious years working in *** i have never seen him in flesh. (only in the company profile under the Board of director section) .. and all of the sudden there were other bosses i occasionally seen seems to pop out walking around in the office like what happen in a cheap movie scene (in which when the movie director says "ACTION", everyone seems to crowd the frame from GOD knows where). I still put that dont-give-a-shit look and just act like a visitor. lalalalal.

Life has not being really productive lately. Motivation and morale bar has turned critically red. Lots of insecurities and confusions going along my way. Finally the company is offering me to a permanent post. Unfortunately, its still not good enough for me. Of course, with a number of years working my ass off i deserved something more than that. Its time to move and dig for other opportunities elsewhere. I'm not going to sit and complain. I guess its time to achieve the satisfaction of working rather than working for the sake of earning. Without doubts, it is hard.. (way way harder than i thought) but everything's got to change. And the only person who could drive me to change is myself. I will be officially leaving this company in September. What will happen next? I am not sure myself. Maybe got married to a rich guy? (ahahaha.. dreaaam on!) Having my own studio with my own galleries on my own wall of fame is still my dream i need to pursue. Yes. It's time to leave.. For now lets go to Midvalley and find the wedding pressie, girls!!!!